Friday, December 25, 2009

14 - thinking about problems.

Let's suppose one has a problem, something worrisome, so the person start to think about it a lot, right?
Usually one repeat in his mind, over and over, what has gone wrong, or what can go wrong, thus provoking anxiety, and a feeling that can be of rage, impotence, despair, etc....
Do you think this can help to solve the problem?
Often this leads only to feel bad.
And may be, to make the situation worse.
What I find to be the better behavior, when I find myself acting like this, is...
1- to recognize that this way of thinking is of no help.
2- to open my mind to find a solution
3- to do the best that I can
4- when I can't do anything more, to wait patiently and faithfully until the problem is resolved
5- trying to stay serene, knowing that feeling bad is of no use
Hope this can help ;-)

Friday, December 18, 2009

Think outside the box.

Yesterday my 12-y-o daughter, wanted to go shopping with me (alone), so I asked my husband to stay with the almost 4-y-o boy.
Hubby, after 8 hours of hard work, absolutely needed to take a nap, so, agreed but only if his son would take a nap with him.
Obviously the boy, after crying because he wanted to come with us, and being absolutely denied the possibility (shopping with him is too much stressful), agreed to stay at home, but only if he could see the cartoons.
Obviously again, papa, won't let him alone in the living room while he was sleeping, so, no way!
I told my daughter that she could go shopping way!
Then I told my daughter to go out with her friend...the cell phone was off!
Then I told my daughter we could go shopping tomorrow...sad face!
Let's say, that sometimes to have an agreement is somehow difficult.
And let's say that this discussion was not conducted in a composed way.
Then I thought, "wait! there must be some other way!" I calmed down and immediately
the solution came to me, we could go out after my husband wake up.
It was obvious, but nobody thought about it, because usually we don't like her to be out when it's dark, but being my daughter with me, there was no problem.
Why did I tell you this story?
Ah, yes, I thought that was a good example of how, when one cools down and opens his mind to other possibilities, a solution is often found.
And that often we are boxed in, by our habits, way of thinking, conditioning, etc....
Ah, the joys of having a family!

Sunday, December 13, 2009

When will I be happy?

Recently I was watching on TV, a guy who reached the Magnetic North Pole.
He was in this desolate, ice cold, snowy, middle of nowhere (the North Pole), and said, now I'm happy.
This made me think, if he's happy in such surroundings, he could have chosen something closer to home.
Just kidding.
Sometimes (often) we think, when I'll....( add your favorite, succeed, slim, become rich, have a relationship, climb a mountain, reach the North Pole.... ) then I will be happy.
My proposal is, let's be happy now, regardless, and then let's reach what it makes us more satisfied ( if it's worth....hey guy, nothing personal );-D

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Do you feel good enough?

Hi everybody!
Do you sometimes feel you are not good enough?
May be your parents (or someone else) "make you feel" this way?
Today I found a fantastic tool to eliminate this feeling, and this belief.
For here!
(I tried and it seems it works)

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Money , money, money.

If you have financial problems, if you are struggling with the bills to pay, if you can't understand why, despite all your efforts you can't succeed, there is a book that can answer to your questions.
And I found it for free here, I can not certify that it works (yet), because I read it recently, but I can say It opened my eyes a lot, about important things in life, not only money.
I recommend it.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Fears, phobias and traumas.

Let's say you have a phobia for some animals (spiders, insects, dogs...), or you have fear to fly, or to go to the dentist.....or you have lived a traumatic event...something that when you think of it, you feel upset.
There is a technique from NLP that can help to disassociate disturbing emotions from traumatic events, or from fearful situations.
So that you can feel serene and detached from it.
Nice, uh?
Now, you need to sit comfortable and undisturbed for at least 15 min.
Close your eyes and visualize yourself entering in a cinema, you walk in the middle of the room and sit in a chair.
Look at the screen, there is a movie playing, featuring this event that you already lived or that you imagine.
The movie is in black and white and you are the main character.
Now imagine that you are in the projector's room, seeing yourself seated in the cinema and seeing the movie from afar.
Weird, I know, but it's done to detach yourself more from what's going on....on the screen.
Ok, now let the movie play, in black and white, the stressful situation....for example you see the spider, scream terrified, then someone get rid of it, and you calm down.
At this point you step in the movie, now you are living it, as in real life, the scene turn in colors, and you watch the movie backwards, as if on rewind.
Moreover, doing this rewind as fast as possible, you play a funny music, like a circus or cartoon one.
This part, reliving the movie from end to start, in a fast rewind and with music, you repeat it several times, 5 o 6.
After some rest you will find that thinking to the same situation is no more, or less anxiety-provoking.
Usually this technique works immediately, but if, after some days you feel the problem is not resolved yet, you can do it again.
And now you can get rid of all your fears! Woo Hoo!

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